I am going to post a gripe.
I may be whining, bitching and/or complaining, but it’s my blog and my perogative.
I am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I am even more sick and tired of seeing doctors and getting no help, no diagnosis. I am at the end of my rope. I don’t even know what to do or where to go from here.
If it weren’t for the fact that this most recent doctor stated directly to me that he “believes I have something very real happening” and that it is not in my head, then I think that I would, at this point, be inclined to start believing it to all be in my head.
Unfortunately, this specialist said outright that he cannot help me. He wants to but he doesn’t know how, it is beyond what he is capable of. Wow. That is frighteningly human of a doctor to admit to that.
He also informed me that after a month of testing my glucose levels and having been diagnosed with diabetes, he is retracting his original diagnosis because even without medication my numbers look good. He said I am riding the fence between being diabetic and NOT being diabetic and that I need to keep my diet, weight and exercise in check, as well as occasionally testing myself just to see how my sugar level is.
So, not being diabetic is good news. But it also kind of sets me back a notch as far as a diagnosis. Now there is nothing to blame my symptoms on and I have to start all over.
I honestly am feeling a bit defeated. Even the doc doesn’t know where to send me. He suggested I call Wash. U and see if they can recommend someone that has more ability to “experiment” with my symptoms. In other words, he has no idea. If he doesn’t know, then how the hell should I know. I don’t know if I can continue. I don’t even know where to begin.
I suppose, as much as it sounds like I am just feeling sorry for myself to say this, that I will just wait until something more dreadful happens and in the meanwhile just try to deal with feeling like shit all the time.